Denial

I am just wondering why there are lots of people who kept on denying things which are really not supposed to. Are they ashamed of it or are they just doing it for nothing. I would respect the fact when privacy comes into place. But how about when someone starts to deny a person, worse... denying a partner? isn't it that already too offensive for that person?

I am not pertaining to someone else in this entry. It's just that, questions keep on formulating in my mind. Bugging me. And I just want to share it, because maybe someone might know the answer.

Does anyone know???

One step at a time...

Finally, I can sense myself in this world. Lately, I have not been the "normal" me (I guess)... Hahahaha...


Oh well. Kidding aside, I am now trying to finalize what I wanted to do with my life now after taking my 26 days vacation last June 'til mid-July. My #1 goal is to change my career before the year ends. I somehow need a little change in my life right now. Need a better job which gives better pay and opportunities for me. When I finally get to stabilize my career and have enough savings, I'm planning to migrate in US mainland or if not somewhere in Europe. London or Italy would be good. Eeeeeeer... Darn I am so so desperate now to change my life and try to move on with my life now. I know that it'll not be that easy, but I swear I would do all my best for all this to happen.


Ooooohhhh... I just wish everything's gonna be alright starting from today...

Boredom

When you try to seach online - through Google Search - the definition of boredom this will appear on your screen...

A chosen state of mind brought on by laziness and the firm belief that others are in charge of the so supposedly afflicted person's own entertainment.

Well... that's exactly what I am feeling right now. It is hard to overcome such situation when at the same time, laziness comes into the scene. No matter how you would like time to pass by as fast as possible, it would seem like it even gets slower and slower.

I tried browsing the net for more tutorial sites i could visit and be one of my resources in the future, i also made updates on my Friendster account, hop into different forums, download images/renders, chat with few friends in YM who are still on-line right at this hour, I also even tried to scan tv channels for more interesting tv programs to watch, and many more. But still, here I am, really bored and can't even sleep.

Chain Mail

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared.

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No it's not. Please it's too scary!

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: Fine I love you. Slow down!

Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.

Girl : *hugs him*

Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put
it on
yourself? It's bugging me.

Girl: Alright, now slow down

Guy: I love you babe

Girl: I love you too, please just slow down
now!
Please...

(in the paper the next day):
A motorcycle had crashed into a building
because
of brake failure. Two people were on it,
but only 1
had survived.


The truth was that halfway down the
road, the guy
realized that his brakes broke, but he
didn't want to
let the girl know. Instead, he had her say
she loved
him and felt her hug one last time, then
he had her
wear his helmet so that she would live
even though
it meant that he would die.




This story is extracted from what people who go online mostly hate - chain email/bulletion/etc. But i won't let anyone copy this and repost it, hehehe. I would just like to share it to everyone who finds time to read my blog. Its a nice story that tries to show everyone what true love could do. *teary*

Forgive and Forget

"Forgive and Forget" these are the common words we hear when some of our so-called friends always say whenever they try to comfort us in times of despair. I don't know. But for me these do not apply in reality. As long as there is a scar left within us, painful experiences will never be forgotten. Scars can't be easily erased and so are our experiences. Our experiences will then be the memories that we either cherish or forever will hate. And just like scars, memories will remain as is, but the "exact" feeling of hatred, hurt, and the tears shed will never be felt again. Similar situation might happen again, but some of us learn already from our mistakes and now try to face it and are standing firm to withstand the hurt that penetrates against us. Some successfully survives and remains standing still, while others fall on their knees once again.

It is very easy to forgive someone because I know it is not mainly his/her fault why he/she was able to do such things. There are lot of factors affecting each and everyone's decisions, no matter how we deny it. This may be of free will or you were just forced to do such because it is needed.

The only thing that we could do now is to learn how to move on. We still have our lives ahead of us. Let us just always keep in mind that the person who have hurt you and made you cry is not the only person who cares for you right now. You have your friends around you, your family, the great one, and there is still one person waiting for you somewhere around the corner. Nobody knows who this someone is. But we also don't know, you might have met him/her already it's just that both of you just need more time to realize it.

Never forget what you've been through. But don't make it a reason for you not to move on and make your self suffer more. Let it be a memory, a memory that will give you courage and strength to move on and an experience for you to learn upon. Learn from your mistakes, and try your very best to overcome it so the same mistake would never happen again.

The "ME"

I am not who you think I am. I am a very sensitive and selfish person who simply wants attention from people close to me. I barely smile nor laugh. I easily get irritated and get affected by unlikely situations.

Some of these may really sound unrealistic or sarcastic but hey, wait 'til you meet the real me then you'll know what I mean. When will that be? I dunno. But when it does, that's when you start judging the real "ME".

But for now just maybe you could keep this in mind. I became that person (mentioned earlier) because of the life that I have now. A life that's so complicated and ruled by inequality.